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Welcome to BobKat's Lair ®

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A lair is a home; A castle; A burrow; A haven; a place where one should feel safe. To ensure our safety especially in one's lair, we have laws. And some laws cause more harm than good!

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Time for the awakening...

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July 30, 2011

The Tea-Party; The Fed. Debt Crisis; Casey Anthony and, US Patent # 6,630,507 - PART THREE

What possible link could there be between the subjects in the title of this post? Yes, I bit off a lot... the truth is, what links these subjects together are lies, politics, the public circus, failure to do diligent research and failure to act responsibly.

Let's investigate:

The current crisis in Congress - the so-called Federal Debt Crisis. I believe I've covered the facts surrounding the crisis. As noted, the "Tea-Party" elected Republicans have a stake in the outcome of the stand-off regarding an increase to the federal debt ceiling - something raised hundreds of times in the past without a grotesque parade. But this time around, D-Day, as the Tea-Party elect have an oath-bound duty to cut spending, reduce the national debt, cap the national debt, and end social programs. What's ironic is that when Pres. Geo W Bush was elected President he inherited a budget surplus...

Look, I'm not into bashing Bush, but Pres. Obama inherited quite the burden. To top it off the Congressional elections in 2010 - with the introduction of the rogue element "The Tea-Party", was a bit too much. Today, at a time of record unemployment, cuts to social services, threats to income and health benefits for senior citizens, the current House is inundated with rogue Tea-Party elect, and causing chaos in Congress. That's a fact. At the head of the House body is Republican Speaker of the House Boehner, pronounced (Bane - er). I feel sympathy for him because i believe strongly he is an experienced, intelligent man, but he is powerless to mediate among the rogue elements in the House, and so he is treading water... hoping for a miracle that will likely not arrive.

D-Day is inevitable...

Casey Anthony is a private citizen suspected of murdering her daughter Caylee in the 1st degree. Her trial was televised nationally over a number of weeks. She was found "Not-Guilty" of the charge. The prosecution perhaps aimed too high in pursuit of Justice. She was found guilty of "lying to the police", subject to a 4 year prison term, of which she served 3 years. She was released a short time ago and her whereabouts are unknown.

She will be forgotten eventually, but recently a mask of her face sold for 1 million dollars on E-Bay. That's more than most celebrities get for their memorabilia at auction. Unlike a public figure like O.J. Simpson, which i previously tried to suggest as a public figure, I can understand televising his trial. But Casey Anthony, was a private citizen. Televising her trial was inappropriate. It became nothing but a Reality TV Show, with her as the main character.

The death of Caylee Anthony is extremely tragic, and it's natural we'd want Justice to be served. But the facts in this case highlight a prosecution team over-inflated with it's own ideals... charging Casey Anthony with 1st degree murder and other charges for which they really had no proof. Early on in the case, doubt was raised in my mind that Casey may have killed her daughter based on premeditation... it seemed more likely she freaked, and accidentally killed her daughter, then tried to cover it up. But that is not what the prosecution thought...

Casey Anthony was freed... but, as a result of her trial being televised, she is one of the most "hated people" in this country.

After her release the following article emerged from MSNBC: Casey Anthony: How does she rebuild a life?
Advocates who work with former prisoners say she'll need to establish a 'new normal'


According to the article which reveals never before disclosed facts about the life of a person, after incarceration, having been subject to arrest and incarceration, is no casual, simple to recover come effect. Yet we subject 100's of thousands of non-violent "offenders" to this reality yearly. We on the outside hardly give it a second thought... however I urge you do do so.

"Being incarcerated is a traumatic event no matter who you are and no matter how long you stay in," said JoAnne Page, president and chief executive officer of The Fortune Society, a nonprofit social service and advocacy group in New York that works with former prisoners. "I think especially when somebody’s high-profile and when it’s a hard case for people to stomach, it’s much harder."

About 730,000 people are released from state and federal prisons across the country every year, while another seven million cycle through jails annually, Page said.
“No matter what the crime was, what you want is for them to enter society as people who can be constructive in the community," she said. "If that doesn’t happen, everybody gets hurt.” - MSNBC

#4: PATENT # 6,630,507:


United States Patent 6,630,507
Hampson , et al. October 7, 2003
Cannabinoids as antioxidants and neuroprotectants

Abstract
Cannabinoids have been found to have antioxidant properties, unrelated to NMDA receptor antagonism. This new found property makes cannabinoids useful in the treatment and prophylaxis of wide variety of oxidation associated diseases, such as ischemic, age-related, inflammatory and autoimmune diseases. The cannabinoids are found to have particular application as neuroprotectants, for example in limiting neurological damage following ischemic insults, such as stroke and trauma, or in the treatment of neurodegenerative diseases, such as Alzheimer's disease, Parkinson's disease and HIV dementia. Nonpsychoactive cannabinoids, such as cannabidoil, are particularly advantageous to use because they avoid toxicity that is encountered with psychoactive cannabinoids at high doses useful in the method of the present invention. A particular disclosed class of cannabinoids useful as neuroprotective antioxidants is formula (I) wherein the R group is independently selected from the group consisting of H, CH.sub.3, and COCH.sub.3. ##STR1##


This is a patent the Federal Government filed and owns with regards to staking a claim on medical benefits.

There are actually many other patents too, not just owned by the Federal Government.

U.S. Patent Documents
2304669 December 1942 Adams
4876276 October 1989 Mechoulam et al.
5227537 July 1993 Stoss et al.
5284867 February 1994 Kloog et al.
5434295 July 1995 Mechoulam et al.
5462946 October 1995 Mitchell et al.
5512270 April 1996 Ghio et al.
5521215 May 1996 Mechoulam et al.
5538993 July 1996 Mechoulam et al.
5635530 June 1997 Mechoulam et al.
5696109 December 1997 Malfroy-Camine et al.
6410588 June 2002 Feldmann et al.
Foreign Patent Documents
427518 May., 1991 EP
576357 Dec., 1993 EP
656354 Jun., 1995 EP
658546 Jun., 1995 EP
WO9305031 Mar., 1993 WO
WO9412667 Jun., 1994 WO
WO9612485 May., 1996 WO
WO9618600 Jun., 1996 WO
WO9719063 May., 1997 WO
99/53917 Oct., 1999 WO


Several attempts have been made over the past 40 years to have cannabis/marijuana reclassified on a federal level, with the DEA. Currently it has been classified and reclassified as a Schedule One drug.

That status conflicts with current laws enacted in 16 states, thus far, as well as 3 or more states where possession of cannabis has been decriminalized. Based on a substantial amount of scientific research (not conducted by the federal government), over the past 40 years, while a Federally sponsored War on Drugs has been waged, proof has emerged that clearly shows cannabis is not the dangerous drug it's been made out to be. It's safer than alcohol and tobacco, and has proven medicinal value. As evidenced in the list of current patents, above.

Yet despite repeated attempts to have cannabis reclassified, the DEA has used it's Big Rubber Stamp every time a petition for rescheduling is submitted.

The first time was:

"NORML, (The National Organization to Reform Marijuana Laws) which began in the early 1970's as the only cannabis lobbyist group in Washington, had filed rescheduling petitions with the DEA in 1972, but was not granted a federal hearing on the issue until 1986. In 1988, DEA Administrative Law Judge Francis Young ruled that marijuana did not meet the legal criteria of a Schedule I prohibited drug and should be reclassified. Then-DEA Administrator John Lawn rejected Young’s determination, a decision the D.C. Court of Appeals eventually affirmed in 1994."

A subsequent petition was filed by former NORML Director Jon Gettman in 1995, but was rejected by the DEA in 2001.

In 2002 another petition was filed...

May 26, 2011 - Washington, DC, USA


Washington, DC: A coalition of public interest advocacy groups filed suit this week in the US Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia to compel the Obama administration to respond to a nine-year-old petition to reclassify marijuana under federal law.

The suit was filed by attorneys Joe Elford of Americans for Safe Access (ASA) and Michael Kennedy of the NORML Legal Committee on behalf of the Coalition for Rescheduling Cannabis (CRC). The Coalition, which includes NORML and California NORML, filed a comprehensive rescheduling petition with the Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) on October 9, 2002, challenging marijuana's Schedule I federal classification as a controlled substance with "no currently accepted medical use" and a "high potential for abuse." The agency formally accepted the petition for filing on April 3, 2003


In all cases the petitions to reclassify cannabis were all but ignored, in the latest case it took the government 9 years to act... and the petition was Rubber Stamped as usual. I note with interest that the DEA apparently submits such petitions to the Dept. of Health and Human Services; something I find of similar concern as I'd expect DHHS to be more informed:

Excerpt from: 40552 Federal Register / Vol. 76, No. 131 / Friday, July 8, 2011 / Proposed Rules

"Services (DHHS). DHHS concluded that
marijuana has a high potential for abuse,
has no accepted medical use in the
United States, and lacks an acceptable
level of safety for use even under
medical supervision. Therefore, DHHS
recommended that marijuana remain in
schedule I. The scientific and medical
evaluation and scheduling
recommendation that DHHS submitted
to DEA is attached hereto."

The War on Drugs is over 40 years old, and still the DEA is cemented into a 1971 ideology. An ideology not even supported by then Pres. Richards Nixon's blue-ribbon conservatives who studied cannabis, and proclaimed there was no reason to make continue criminal status. But Pres. Nixon ignored the report. As the DEA has done ever since.

One has to wonder about the Nature of a Lie? Casey Anthony was found guilty of lying to the police. Have not the DEA proven they are lying to the American people, given evidence of patents for medical value of cannabis owned by the American Government? If true, what function is the DEA employed in? What are the taxes we pay to fund the DEA supporting?

It's a circus in Washington, and President Obama PROMISED to end it... made a lot of promises.

Question is... will he come through for US?

Will the current Congress act responsibly, or be held accountable for damages they cause through oaths to special interest groups or refusal to acknowledge reality and science. As Pres. Obama said recently, some catastrophes we can't plan for, but the federal debt crisis is not one of them. Nor is the DEA's refusal to accept reality. As the following article suggests, The act of growing your own doesn't create violence:

"The Kids Are All Right, Even if Their Parents Grow Pot..." Credit: ParentDish.com


"Just because the folks next door are drug dealers doesn't mean they're bad parents.

In fact, researchers at Toronto's Hospital for Sick Children say the children of couples who operate marijuana grow rooms are often extremely healthy, physically and emotionally..."


Fact is... no one is suggesting cannabis be available to those under a legal age without a doctors prescription, but currently, the War On Drugs is hurting or has hurt millions of American citizens, including myself. Even if you may not approve of it's use, the fact is it's much safer to use than alcohol and tobacco, and as a medicinal herb it's the real thing. It has many benefits for those who want to use it, and to classify it as it currently is, as a dangerous drug, is wrong, incorrect, and harmful to society, especially a free society. It's a plant, a safe plant, non-poisonous, non-toxic, and useful in it's natural form. The only lab that is involved in the manufacture of this plant is Nature. Put a seed in the ground and God does the rest.

Yet we subject people to severe criminal offences for this. Is that right and just?

It's time to stop the hurt, time to demand a credible government and one that is accountable. Is that too much to ask???

July 28, 2011

The Tea-Party; The Fed. Debt Crisis; Casey Anthony and, US Patent # 6,630,507 - PART TWO

D-DAY - MONDAY@MIDNIGHT! As IF Mondays aren't bad enough.

The Circus that is our Federal Government right now is simply ludicrous and unacceptable. Recently elected Republican House Reps are making good on their loyalty to the "Tea-Party". Now I understand that the tea-party is based on the principal of lowering gov't spending, reducing the debt, and reigning in gov't handouts in the form of social services; however; there exists no clear and true charter to any such party; no clear recognition or definition of just what the tea-party is; nor are they apparently playing with a full deck!

So, as I understand it, the basic principles and demands of the House republicans, aka, tea-party elected Republicans is, with regards to what's created the so-called Debt Crisis is, reduced spending equal to the increase to the debt ceiling. So how hard is that? Hard perhaps since the $$$ they want cut have already been approved and spent. Hard in that zero tolerance is vowed towards any new tax revenue. Hard in that no new tax revenue equals no end to ex-Pres. Bushes tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans, many who openly want to contribute more. Hard because what the tea-party republicans will and want cut are social programs, to Medicare, Social-Security, Food-Stamps, Unemployment benefits, public health programs, etc. Essentially, a smaller gov't but a more robust one when it comes to supporting Wall-Street, Big Oil, Corporations, the Military, DEA, ICE (with regards to illegal immigration, not human slavery), an end to all social services and a government that is cutting edge that cuts the throats of average and poor Americans. These are the people, the politicians bringing us to the first ever, artificially, pre-meditated murder of the American Dollar.

#3: CASEY ANTHONY

There may be some people out there who don't know who Casey Anthony is, and those same people never heard of O.J. Simpson. Casey Anthony for those people, of to clarify who I'm writing about was arrested for 1st degree murder of her young daughter, Caylee Anthony. She was found "Not Guilty" of the crime, but found guilty of a lesser crime, "lying to the police".

The death/murder of a little girl is repulsive and extremely tragic. I can't understand how such a thing can happen, or how any person can take another person's life and think it's justified. The recent mass murders in Norway are a prime example. But there are many examples... Ted Bundy, Whitey Bulger, The Green River killer, Charles Manson, Dru Sjodin, Fort Hood Massacre, the list is endless...

Justice is not always a victor, when often additional murders occur when violent persons are paroled, as in the Dru Sjodin case. Often, the wrong person is found guilty of the crime. Sometimes those most served by a life sentence in prison are put to death instead... like the recent case in Texas. Or people are put to death when all options for Justice have not been met, as in the other execution in Texas recently of the Mexican National.

But Justice is blind... it is an ideal that we as Americans value as much as we value family, honest government, the Constitution. In the case of Casey Anthony, Justice was done. A jury of twelve sequestered jurors heard the case as presented by the prosecution, and her defense. It cost a lot of money, the trial, but the alleged crime was serious enough to make it worth it to the state. Unfortunately several things happened that ultimately upset the American public, and why did it upset the American public? Because it was a Nationally Televised Event, 24 hour coverage for several weeks, more air time than even the O.J. Simpson case, and in the end it wasn't the fact that the glove didn't fit, it was a case where the prosecution had failed in proving 1st degree murder. They didn't have the evidence.

It should have never been televised... for several weeks it was a staple of Nancy Grace and CNN, FOX and NBC... I read the news but to watch the circus on TV, no thank-you! It was one thing to watch the O.J. Simpson trial on TV; he was a celebrity. But to watch Casey Anthony LIVE for the alleged murder of her daughter Caylee, to hear about scandalous family issues like incest, rape and abuse... it should have never been televised. It was not public fodder this case. And all it created was a lynch mob, a mob completely angered by the verdict. Well that verdict is what we call Justice.

Fortunately for the Not Guilty Casey, the following scandals and crises' happened... Murdock and the World News, The Federal Debt Crisis, and the massacre of over 70 in Norway by a right-wing extremist.

No one knows where Casey is today, and no one even cares anymore. But the money still follows her... just today I read where a latex mask of her face sold for One Million Dollars ($999,900 to be exact) on E-Bay: STORY HERE The person selling it described it the "scariest face in the world", or something like that. Ahhh, I think not... plenty scarier; like House Speaker Boehner (pronounced bane-err); or Michele Bachmann, aka Queen Bee of the Tea-Party; or Michele Leonhart, Director of the DEA (more on her in the next and final post/conclusion).

We will never know what happened to Caylee Anthony, but to make the whole case a Reality TV Show was plain wrong. We as a nation should have more common sense when it comes to matters of Justice, as well as matters such as the current fabricated Debt Crisis that is likely to spin this country in ways Homeland Security should already be preparing for. To have our Congress playing Russian Roulette with the power invested in them by the American people is a travesty; it is just cause to enact a national vote of No-Confidence; to seriously question whether certain newly elected representatives are acting in the best interests of the American People, or fulfilling oaths to unrecognized/fringe parties with their own self-interests?

Think Casey Anthony is scary? Look at the circus in Washington!!!

July 23, 2011

The Tea-Party; The Fed. Debt Crisis; Casey Anthony and, US Patent # 6,630,507 - PART ONE



World News Today, with BobKat...

The news these days is rather overwhelming, don't you think? It's immediate and generally shocking or suspenseful, and biased, depending on where you find it. All bad news it seems; one catastrophe, crisis or scandal after another. So yeah it feels like I'm destined to provide, the news of the world.

Odd how the title of this post is four different stories, yet you'll see how they all come together in the end.

In the Old World, the age of the Greeks and Romans, this was the opposite of their reality. They had no newspapers, radios, televisions... everything arrived via courier. That the Roman Empire could spread as far north as present day England, is truly amazing. They grew so large a second capitol was founded in Constantinople. With a second emperor... Imagine the USA with two federal governments? One in Washington, the other in California. Two Presidents with equal power over the whole of the nation? That's how large the Republic of Rome became by about AD200.

What they lacked contributed greatly to the fall of the Roman Empire. They lacked rapid communications; something we have an over-abundance of.

We are a "Republic" too. Not a "Democracy" as we are brought up to believe. A republic can have the roots of a democracy, that I believe would be the original Constitution. Sacred in all things we do. A republic has representatives for the people's vote... which is our political electoral college. A true Democracy is quite different, the people actually vote. Look it up!




Topics for Today:

#1)"The Tea-Party", c2010: First, they stole my "flag" for their own purposes without asking. Not that they had to ask, being as it was open-source. It's just that this flag, represents a lot of things to a lot of people, and to hijack that image, for the purposes of the organization, is irresponsible. I understand the whole "No New Taxes" thing, and "Cap and Cut". What I don't understand is, Speaker of the House Boehnor, speaking over and over yesterday about the President wanting "new taxes". They are not NEW. They are a roll-back from Pres. George W. Bush's Tax-cut era... for which the wealthy benefited considerably with a tax-cut. Pres. Obama wants that tax cut changed, and I strongly agree. The Tea-Party" apparently is in support of the wealthy Americans, and Big Corporations... not me, or others of us in the middle to lower classes, who would only see improvements if Pres. Obama could find a way to organize the House Republicans, the teenagers of the bunch, many of whom signed "VOWS" or pledges, unbreakable vows pertaining to their decisions in office. Like, "No increase of taxes", and "'marriage vows' - marriage is sex only between a man and a woman."

They stole my flag

The Federal Debt "Crisis", is a crisis to House Republicans, and a threat to the American people. It is immaturity in Washington,a result in part of a newly elected mass of republicans in the House that signed oaths, to get elected by Tea-Party members. Michelle Bachman, presidential hopeful for 2012, is an example of a politic aspired party who signed such an oath the "Marriage", in her case. The crisis is their own invention, their own problem, until, it becomes a problem for and an embarrassment to the American people. If we default, it will be the end of cooperation between the People and Washington. When people see their interest rates go up, their income go down, and their status in the world crumbles... there will be more than a debt crises, you think things were bad during the 1960's, well just wait.

The following link shows how not only are those oaths and vows these politician's are signing are a hindrance to good governance, change and adaptation, but rather, they sign them under an oath to God.

According to biblical scholars on the subject these republicans are committing a sin....The following article from CNN, by Stephen Prothero, Special to CNN, highlights how these republicans have been led astray by Satan.

Next time:

Part Two: Casey Anthony... There's much more to learn from this media phenomenon than a woman acquitted of murdering her child, and the "public gallows" it represented to the World public. Herein is Justice...

July 03, 2011

THE HUMAN CONDITION - INTRODUCTION

40 years I've considered this topic... lived it, as we all do. It's an ambitious topic for me, as it is subjective, yet I have a lot of objective experience to draw from, experience that's had an effect on me and my psyche.

Some of the topics within The Human Condition I wish to approach, include: "self-image", "sexuality", "gender identity", "mental health issues", "suicide", "career decisions", "acceptance and rejection", "bullying - both as a victim and as an offender", "physical and/or psychological abuse", "fatigue", "ecstasy - 'the feeling', not the drug", and "drugs", of course - "both illicit and licit ones and the general effects of their use on the person, and the empirical extension of use into society".

An enormous goal on my part, but one that I have studied and researched for 40 years. A subject I can't help but be fascinated by, drawn into, and at times obsessed with.The "human condition is our life, and our death. We follow our fiddler within and it takes us places. Some of these places are bland and boring, like a job where one works but watches the clock day after day, waiting to be released, while other jobs, the time goes too quickly, and one can't wait for the next day. Some of these places are like dreams, perhaps exotic and euphoric, or perhaps life-threatening, and for some, what started out as a routine day ends either in tragedy or a near death experience.

We fall in love, we fall out... we are wrapped in the embrace of those we are in love with one day, and exiled the next. We are conscious of it all, even if, we succumb to hard drugs to forget, or casual ones that either help us cope, or those which help us to become more immersed in the experience.

A daunting task for me to pursue... one which I feel is vital and essential do undertake. One that begins with ME, my experiences, and builds from there.

**********************************************************************************************

Wikipedia has the following link to "the Human Condition: The human condition encompasses the experiences of being human in a social, cultural, and personal context. It can be described as the irreducible part of humanity that is inherent and not connected to gender, race, class, etc. -- a search for purpose, sense of curiosity, the inevitability of isolation, fear of death, etc.". The page is a bit crude by Wiki standards... but it gets me going in a direction, starting with Existentialism - This from Wikipedia: "Existentialism is a term applied to the work of a number of philosophers since the 19th century who, despite large differences in their positions,[1][2] generally focused on the condition of human existence, and an individual's emotions, actions, responsibilities, and thoughts, or the meaning or purpose of life.[3][4] Existential philosophers often focused more on what they believed was subjective, such as beliefs and religion, or human states, feelings, and emotions, such as freedom, pain, guilt, and regret, as opposed to analyzing objective knowledge, language, or science."

That link brought back some memories... from my early 20's... when I began to question the world I found myself in. Until that time, I didn't question things in quite the same way.

I didn't question the Human Condition... for the first 17 - 19 years of my life. I questioned survival, and being a voracious reader, I questioned fiction and fantasy about space travel, aliens, other worlds, future space wars, being in love, with a alien female, finding a partner, a female partner, love, devotion, a world different from what I lived everyday for all those years.

I got into my first fight with another boy around age 4, about the same time my mother let me cross our not so busy street to the other side. It's so mind-blowing today, remembering how at 4 I crossed the road, to what was a side lawn to a house, met my nemesis, Michael, fro a block away, roughly my age, and he beat me up.

Why?

Why not?

It's not why... it just was. At that age, those things just happen. The human condition, which over time evolves.

I got glasses around age 6, had bad allergies that swelled my eyes shut. I wasn't good at baseball or football... though in our extended neighborhood of kids my age, we formed both; we played at a corner of the elementary school property, and I became their 3RD baseman - for our Yankee's team. I remember being thankful I wasn't the pitcher... since pitchers can get hit by the ball. I wasn't good at catching those balls that came my way, nor batting. I just didn't get it. My mind told me to be the best, to become popular and successful, but that same mind was off in fantasy land - aliens, other worlds, growing up.

I was the underdog, small for my age up through 11th grade in HS. My family moved during 5TH grade, to a smaller, more prominent town. The first day in school, 5TH grade I was standing in the hallway waiting to get into homeroom with everyone else, when a jerk walked by and kicked my feet out from under me. My ass hit the floor with a thud, hurt like hell.

I didn't make any friends, all through middle school into high school. I suffered much in the way of bullies. Spoke often to counselors at the school, and to my parents who helped the best they could. I loved my reading and science classes... a bully in among ever mix.

Somehow I survived.I graduated age 18, but didn't attend graduation. My next stop was college, not to be questioned, however I had no idea what to enroll in, other than electrical technology, because I liked experimenting with electronics, and chemistry. So I enrolled in a BS of Electrical Technology and switched to liberal arts, after I discovered an interest in writing, and my imagination awakened.

I have a sister a year and a half younger than me. At age 4 to 7 I hung out with her and her friends Ann and Julie. We sang "Row, Row, Row your boat...", played Simon Says, and Hop Scotch... caught grasshoppers in a field next to a neighbors house. I went to kindergarten for the first time, remember trouble tying my shoes, getting along with others, and while laying down for nap-time, the teacher who was very heavy walked over me so I could see up her skirt. Now why would that even attract my attention - at 5 years old, why would the crotch of a women even interest me. But I remember that, and little else.

Around age 7 my mother forbid me to hang out with my sister... I was to hang out with boys my age, so she fixed me up, and things moved on from there to where that fixed-up friendship didn't last long but I found male friends in the extended neighborhood, which is where being a Yankees 3Rd baseman came to be.

After moving, although I was often treated as the underdog among my friends in my birth neighborhood, rather than find friends at my new school, I took the bus on weekends and visited my old friends, staying with my grand-parents.

I didn't get it, any of it. I did have a childhood, and it wasn't marred by any sexual abuse; thank God! But what haunts me is I had very little self-awareness. I had a lot of imagination, and and company, but going into puberty, I can recall having no idea of where I was, while other boys my age knew a lot about where they were... they followed their libido, scored, and were getting married as I graduated high school.

So what was the meaning of life? I really didn't know, and really I didn't care. I liked girls, but had no social skills. I enrolled in college because that was what I was suppose to do. I got a job at a department store, and although i worked hard, I don't recall any recognition of my work. In fact after the 2nd year I got laid off Christmas Eve... rehired a year later.

The "Human Condition" I lived with was getting me nowhere... although while working at the department store I began to flirt, began to reach out to women and even a couple male friends. One girl I really liked I got a date with her... we ended up parking down off the road next to a college park... we began some heavy make-out, only to be interrupted by the police, that tapped on my car windshield, ending my first sexual encounter. Causing much embarrassment. We didn't have a second date.

A friend at the store had a cousin who I started to see. I don't recall that we ever did much... I remember often, visiting her at her house, her parents would disappear, and I would lay on top of her, on the couch kissing - closed mouthed, me trying to get a feel of her breasts beneath her shirt or sweater. She would not french-kiss or let me see her naked because she'd gone that far before with a past guy, and he'd dumped her. That convinced her she'd been wrong in the past to provide erotic pleasures. The relationship lasted about 3 years, going nowhere. What a waste... but that is the Human Condition.

Meanwhile, my parents were eager for me to get married, have children, get a good job and live the American Dream. Eager in the sense my phone rang daily and I was asked, "are you married yet, and why not?"

Next time: Friedrich Nietzsche, and my introduction to the Human Condition.