THE LIFE STAGES - THREE OR SEVEN? YOU DECIDE... PART ONE

Frankly, I can only speak for myself here. The following posts address a long standing philosophy us humans established, to find cause and effect of being alive and conscious... Three Stages of Life (and I don't mean Birth/Life/Death) or Seven Life Stages? I'm here to discuss them both.

Comments are encouraged and welcome.

Regardless of how many stages you believe there are in life the underlying principles remain the same  The difference are in your core your beliefs... for example, religious persons are probably more inclined, I feel, to believe in the Three Stages theory. Others, just as passionate and devoted in their beliefs might find the Seven Stages more palatable.

PART ONE:

THE THREE STAGES OF LIFE:

Traditionally, if you want to believe it - they are:  Childhood, Adulthood, Old Age.

Stage 1: As a baby/child/teenager you're Stage 1;  you have no control over your existence. You may be raised in the Church of Anything and be forced to believe in the cause... but regardless, you have no control over much of your environment or destiny.  You're helpless and at the mercy of your parents and the system of education you find yourself in. You are this until age 18 or 21... the change-over isn't well defined - dying for your country doesn't count towards consumption of alcohol, most everything else though... until you take the initiative and actually move away from home.

Stage 2: Still a child as an adult in the beginning - leaving home, going off to college or war, there's no escaping the inescapable hold of family. Still, you now have some control over your own destiny. If remaining back home you'd be expected to find a job, marry, buy a home, have children, entertain family and in-laws. Your extended family might still in control of your life, though they give you some independence as time passes. If you move away, expect much the same, only from a distance, which from my experience didn't help a lot. Yeah, eventually you get older (actually fairly quickly), gain more autonomy and your family superiors die off, leaving you alone with your wife, if you have one, children too - if you have children,  who also often move away, and you're alone, most likely. Dreams, you finally find yourself asking, what are dreams?

Stage 3: Elderly... old age... over 60... you can now retire and reap your rewards in Social Security and that pension you've worked for for over 30 years... You can exercise dominion over those younger than you... you move to Florida, buy a condo, and the light will quickly follow you to your grave.

That is what's considered by many to be the ideal map for people.  Very simple. Just one easily defined road. Three simple stages in life. And the fact, some people are more "successful" and wealthy than others. Way it is. Work hard, roll the dice...

For My Next Post... 

THE SEVEN STAGES OF LIFE:

1) Infant/Newborn, 2) Child, 3) Teenager, 4) Young Adult, 5) Adult, 6) Middle Aged, 7) Senior Citizen. Yes, this can be further extended, and it should be... for example a kindergarten aged child, into 1st and 2nd grades... distinct from a preschooler, another category, and a person aged 7 - 10, a separate cat., prior to : preteen, puberty, followed by teenager. followed by 16 to 18 year old's, then 18 to 21 years old's,  21 to 25... 25 to 30... 30 - 40,; 40 - 50; 50 - 60; and life after 60, where I have not gotten to yet. That's something like 20 Life Stages... all unique in there own way.

That in my next post...

THE PRESIDENTIAL DEBATES 2012 - # 1; AND AN UNPRECEDENTED CHICAGO DRUG BUST!!!

But First! In memory of Rufus the Rooster, who died Tues., Oct. 02, the victim of a coyote attack, along with one of his hens...

No trace of Rufus has been found... though we searched. The incident took place, it is assumed, mid-morning when Rufus and his flock of hens were across the road in the woods. It wasn't until late afternoon we realized that Rufus was missing. At that time a search was carried out. The feathers of a white hen were discovered across the road, along a path in the woods, a couple piles of feathers from the hen were seen along two parts of the path. The search ended at a stream, where the trail of mayhem disappeared. No sign of Rufus was ever found.

It should be noted that Rufus was a BIG rooster, with sharp spurs (note: right foot) and bountiful tail-feathers:

Obviously a rooster, even a BIG rooster like this, can only do so much against a great predator like a coyote. But Rufus was if nothing else, the exception... I rest assured Rufus put up a good fight and gouged out the coyote's eyes before meeting his end! He died protecting his hens... a valiant hero in the annals of rooster lore. He'll be missed.

Rufus and his flock of hens:

Predators can strike at any time. Living among chickens and roosters has taught me a lot, like they have an extraordinary sense of awareness and effective methods of communication. They make lots of vocal sounds... and to be caught by surprise by a predator is unusual, with roosters around, as they are quite astute at sensing danger.

Not so for the average American it would seem.

First up, the first official Presidential debates between President Obama and Mitt Romney. Sorry, I can't post any links as all links are restricted by Federal Law. But I can post my thoughts, and it just so happened a national surveyor called and wanted to ask me a few questions with regards to my opinion.

"Hi, Acme Survey, we'd like to ask you a few questions about your response to the 1st presidential Debates?"

Me: "Sure".

Acme: "Who do you think won the debate?"

Me: "No one"

Acme: "Why do you say that?"

Me: "It wasn't a debate, it was a staged event."

Acme: "Explain?"

Me: "Since Obama took office the major agenda has been the war in Afghanistan,  Iran, Congressional mayhem and in-fighting; the economy, enforcing the War on Drugs - while renaming it as the federal public safety drug enforcement regulation. None of the questions asked were really focused on the real issues."

Acme: "So you watched the debate?"

Me: "No. I read about it online".

Acme: "Thank-you. Next question, "what question, if any, would you like to have seen posed to the the two Presidential candidates?"

Me: "Which one of you is going to decriminalise cannabis?"

Acme: "What's cannabis?"

Me: "Pot, commonly called marijuana which is a term prejudicial to the people of Mexico."

Acme: "Final question: do you plan on voting for Mitt Romney, President Obama, or not vote?"

Me: "I plan on voting for the third presidential candidate, Gary Johnson; Libertarian party."

Acme: "Who?"

Me: "Gary Johnson".

Acme: "That does not compute. Good day."

***

And finally - In The News... Chicago police discover a huge crop of marijuana growing on the city's south side... described as the size of two "two football fields". It was apparently near to Chicago's police helicopter dispatch center, and police helicopters routinely passed over-head over the "drug production enterprise." They can't explain the "drug operation" going on all summer under their noses. 

I can't explain it either - but given the deadly effects of marijuana exposure one would have thought many people in southern Chicago would have developed symptoms, like fevers, hallucinations, psychotic episodes, hilarity, insanity, or worse.

Again, I can't post any photo's of the publicly available photo's of the crime scene due to federal copyright regulations, though I think I can post this link for the whole story: FOX NEWS: Police-in-Chicago-Uncover-Nearly-1000-Pot-Plants-in-City.

I find it ludicrous to begin with that the article titled: "Police in Chicago became farmers for a day Wednesday as they began to chop down a  marijuana farm as big as two football fields found in the city."

Somehow I don't think that makes the Chicago police farmers. I'd select a term more akin to an invading army of crusaders for the moral right.

According to Chicago Superintendent Garry McCarthy, whose team of law enforcement officers erradicated the field of horror - putting their own lives in danger! He said, "those involved with narcotics, whether it is marijuana, heroin or cocaine, purchase firearms with their profits and have shown they're willing to use them to protect their business... That's where the violence comes in, the competition for the markets."

Yeah, 1920's Prohibition, ad naseum...

Waste of my taxes! Legalize already - Stop the Hurt!!!

FIONA APPLE - MUSICIAN - ARRESTED/CHARGED FOR 3RD DEGREE FELONY POSSESSION OF HASHISH

Fiona Apple, the singer/songwriter; musician was busted on her tour bus in Hudspeth County, TX, for possession of  3 to 4 grams of hashish - the natural resin the cannabis plant exudes when flowering. It's not manufactured in a lab, but rather, it is a natural substance.

Source: ENTERTAINMENT TODAY/Hudspeth County Sheriff's Office

The checkpoint she was stopped at is well known for getting celebrities arrested; Willie Nelson being an example at the same border patrol check-point. You'd thing the celebrity; agents would know not to let their client go through there... if they had a lick of sense and awareness.

The law is the law... here being possession of any amount of hashish beings a 3RD degree felony. $10,00 fine, 2 - 10 years in prison.

The problem with that, namely is, does the; punishment fit the crime?

The crime: "Possession of Hashish", a resinous constituent of the cannabis plant.

Justification for the crime? None scientifically established. Many drug laws are based on principal, historical obsolescence and/or plain misunderstanding.

Courtesy of the following source (highlighted), here is the break-down of arrests in Texas for 3rd Degree Felonies:

(1) Drug abuse violations 1,841,182 (2) Driving while Intoxicated 1,427,494 (aka; Felony DUI);(3) Property crime 1,610,088 (includes burglary, larceny, theft, motor vehicle theft, and arson.)(4) Larceny-theft 1,172,762;(5) Assault 1,305,693;(6) Disorderly conduct 709,105;(7) Liquor laws 633,654;(8) Violent crime 597,447 (including murder, non-negligent manslaughter, forcible rape, robbery, aggravated assault. (9) Drunkenness 589,402;(10) Aggravated assault 433,945 (11) Burglary 303,853;(12) Vandalism 291,575 (13) Fraud 252,873 (14) Weapons violations (carrying or possession) 188,891 (15) Curfew and loitering 143,002 (16) Robbery 126,715;(17) Offenses against family and children 122,812;(18) Stolen property (buying, receiving, possession) 122,061;(19) Motor vehicle theft 118,231;(20) Forgery and counterfeiting 103,448;

 

NOTE: There is zero discussion of drug violations, yet they make up the majority of felony arrests. Why is that?

Possession of marijuana, cannabis or hashish as a violation of human law is not a legitimate crime. It is clear in the Holy Bible that use of plants provided by God is legitimate. This is laid out in Genesis.

There is enough scientific fact to rescind all drug laws, as out-dated and ineffective at providing for public safety, as the laws themselves promote more harm than the plant being prohibited.

A pipe-dream perhaps...

The good news, I can hope for is Fiona Apple has the money for a very good defense team... and will fight this to the end... she broke the law, granted, but what good is a law that is not based on science? That is based on fantasy and principal. No justification has ever been provided as proof for cannabis prohibition  in fact, the opposite occurs. Beginning with: On March 22, 1972, the Commission's chairman, Raymond P. Shafer, presented a report to Congress and the public entitled "Marijuana, A Signal of Misunderstanding," which favored ending marijuana prohibition...

Yet here we are 40 years later still putting people in prison and harassing them for use of a plant ... for shame.

Prisons are for criminals who hurt people, not people who possess a plant. 

This country prints "In God We Trust" on the back of all our money. It has been so since the late 1950's. A genius President decided "We The People" trusted in God... yet years on, it's not the atheists causing the problems, it's the evangelicals themselves, tripping over their own convictions.

God gave humans the plants of the earth in Genesis. Cannabis included. No man-made law cannot trump that. Fiona Apple is innocent under God's law, and we live in a country that abides by "In God We Trust". If that's not true, perhaps it's time to admit it, and remove it, the motto, from our money.

In support of Fiona, I am going to buy some apples and send them to my favorite politician. Obama might be one of them. My note will say something like, "Hello from Fiona - Wake up". I don't know yet - playing with lots of ideas.. 

Fiona Apple:

Source: WIKIPEDIA

Stop the Hurt!!! Stop the ignorance!!!

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS - ISN'T THAT ILLEGAL?

I had what some, especially those older than 70, would consider to be a perverse childhood, in that, as a young boy, 5 - 7 my friends were my sister and her two friends, all younger than me. I have fond memories of playing hopscotch, Simon says, and singing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat..." with them, and hunting for grasshoppers in a field.

My mother wasn't to keen on it, and had grievous concerns that if it continued, I'd become gay. She arranged a situation essentially ordering me to hang out with this new neighborhood boy instead of my sister and friends. That didn't last long, but by the time I was 8 I had met other people in the area and had boys to hang out with and lead what could be construed as a normal boyhood.

But the fact is... those early memories stuck to me, and by the time I'd turned 20, I knew I really liked women, and it wasn't just a marriage thing, or a wham, bam, thank-you ma'am sort of thing - about getting laid, that is.

Some hard things to discuss, but someone's got to do it.

Oh I was horny all right at that age. And a late bloomer. I had a girlfriend for a week in the 8th grade, a very long week that we went steady, kissed one day, talked on the phone for hours and flirted in school. One week, then we broke up.

Around age 18 I went with friends to camp at a state park... others camped in the park, and others included women, and women we found and that's when I lost my virginity. I had a girlfriend at the time too... someone I'd been with for over two years... She had french-kissed with her first boyfriend, who'd broken up with her, so she refused to french-kiss with me because of that. I remember laying on her couch kissing closed mouth, feeling her breasts through her sweater, and that was our relationship for over two years.

Something had to give, or change.My parents of course were waiting for the big marriage announcement. I am the oldest of 4, so of course, after I turned 18, that was the next step in life.

Sorry to disappoint...

My first real girlfriend, was looking back a friend. A very close friend. Not knowing any different, we did "date", so to speak... I had met her at a wild party, gave her a ride home, didn't get her phone #, so had to call around for it, remember a night walking 30 miles in the rain to see her at her home, and getting a ride back later from a friend. I remember we went camping once, and I remember we moved in together and we had a life. We had sex often. And ultimately nothing about our relationship was permanent or to be construed as courtship. We were friends, exchanging benefits.

As the years transpired for me, I had other relationships, and now looking back, in each and every relationship I treated her as a friend, and seemed to get the same in return. None of the relationships lasted, for over 3 years, as many went on to become married and have children, which in my case, the very idea of getting married or having children was something that on a tri-weekly basis I was pestered about from my dear old mother.

Most of my girlfriends would say that things between us seemed so comfortable and intimate. That sex was more sensual and warm. All platitudes, as none of them lasted, long enough to propose. Which I really would have wanted to do, but the women were everywhere, and working at a college at the time, I had plenty of friends... and plenty of criticism to keep me running, dodging, ducking...  oh, yes... the tri-weekly phone calls were quite abrasive... with questions like: "When are you going to grow up?"; "When are you going to get married?"; "When are you going to get serious about life - you'll be in your 50's before you know it!?"; When are you going to stop kidding yourself about the whores you hang out with?".

By age 30 I'd had sex with around 30 women, with another 30 I'd been naked with and kissing... and every single one was a friend. Things rather slowed up after that... my point is I may be guilty of seduction, in many of these liaisons, but every single engagement was through communication. Talk. Honest, "...would you like to have sex?" I never did learn the art of deceitful seduction... for me it was always straightforwards.

So, I've been called out, so to speak, to enlighten us on the concept of Friends with Benefits. As apparently, good, old-fashioned courtship and intimacy without emotion or attachment, is being questioned, and many want to know what else there is? Attachment doesn't happen simply because you become married, which is a joke, really, as many marriages are simply a facade for the act of matrimony, and not real attachment. The marriages that work, I guarantee they are friends. Or have a rigid game-plan they go by.

Men and women can be friends. I know among some of you this is impossible, especially adding sex into the mix. But it's not really.

There's the recent movie, "Friends with Benefits", starring Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake.  It's helped bring the reality that there is such a thing into the public arena.

Within friendship there can be extraordinary trust and openness. And this can logically morph into a sexual relationship. And why not? Sex is physical and it feels good, does the body good. It doesn't have to be about social mores, or involve thoughts of marriage. Friendship involves trust, caring and sharing. 

In the old days... 1700's for example, it wasn't uncommon for a man of status to have a wife and a concubine. Historically, the relationship involved a man in a higher status position, usually with a legally sanctioned wife, who maintains a second household with the lesser "wife". The woman in such as a relationship is referred to as a concubine. In essence, marriage was the status quo, but men had friends, and those friends had a friend. It's not uncommon in the old cemeteries to find a man, usually a governor, a sea-captain, or a preacher, buried with his wife and concubine.

I have a lot of regrets in life... how I didn't know who my friends were, and was so slaughtered by what mores society expected me to abide by, which I didn't, and so was always on the run.

It makes me think, and this is fodder for politicians who are not only our law-makers, but the epitome of what just and moral... I suggest a new law making sex without a license illegal. It makes perfect sense. It is pretty much understood, and taught in our schools that sexual abstinence is good. That sex is like a drug, which makes it bad. That sex should be between husband and wife. That to have sex outside of marriage is bad, and often leads to a crisis, a public health issue, and therefore, should be illegal.

This would effectively block the whole Friends With Benefits idea... and put much more control of peoples rights and sex-lives into the hands of law-makers. We can't smoke marijuana, so why let us have sex outside of marriage. Makes no sense... with all the diseases, unwanted pregnancies, and rapes occurring, make sex illegal without a license.

Seriously, it's said that FWB is cheap, meaningless and men benefit the most. I disagree. First, men generally don't know the first thing about how to be friends with women. Second, a "one-night-stand" is not a friendship that lasted one night. We're talking friendship, not pure lust. Pure friendship I would say, where the two people have a caring connection with each other. There isn't a girlfriend/boyfriend commitment per se, as it's the friendship that keeps the two together. It's hardly cheap, and it's not possessive. It's an arrangement. A mutual understanding.

Which doesn't mean it should be legal... in our national bid to make personal freedom illegal, it's one of those human behaviors politicians should take a serious look at. It's not unlike prostitution, in that, although it be barter, an exchange is made often between the two parties. Persons in FWB relationships often benefit a lot from the arrangement. That goes against the very nature of our society in which puritanical regiments dictate our choices.

I never got married... though I wanted to. I'm sure I would have made a good husband to a woman. A good father. But it didn't happen. Today, at 58 I have to ask myself if that is such a bad thing anymore. Is it not worse that I didn't appreciate what I had when I had it? Isn't it worse that kicking myself into believing I was doing something wrong over the years only made me bitter and depressed in later life? 

I believe strongly that friends between male and female with benefits is a viable life alternative. I believe what I experienced was wholesome and good. I believe we have a flawed system of dating between the sexes. I believe men and women can be friends and can experience profound intimacy if they can just let go and enjoy. 

The best relationships begin as friendships...