BRIANNA MAITLAND - MISSING 12 YEARS. UPDATE!

Another year of a Feb. 09 and March 19th have passed. With no indication to explain how two women just vanished, within a month of each other, under extremely mysterious circumstances, roughly 50 miles apart, in 2004.

Maura Murray vanished around 6:45 PM Feb. 09, 2004 in North Haverhill NH.

Brianna Maitland vanished less than a month later from Montgomery VT, around 11:45PM, Friday, March 19th, 2004.

In March of 2004 I read the story about Brianna, how she had disappeared, saw picture of "the accident" and heard the media say police believed her disappearance was likely related to drug abuse, that she was a child runaway.

Maura Murray, oddly, similar outcome. Police allegedly believe she wanted to disappear, made the plans, and carried them out. Former AG Kelly Ayotte, from the intel I have, also denounced Maura's disappearance as a crime. She gave the family back everything of Maura's they had, then abruptly turned around and took it all back, computer included, but were shy of saying they believed there was any foul play.

The only person to have seen Maura Murray that Feb. 09 was a bus driver and local nearby home-owner. He drove the school-bus, and was returning home that night, just after "the accident" happened. He spoke with her. Offered to help and says she refused.

Locals believe she was determined to disappear on her own. Other's are none too sure.

A few years ago NH formed a Cold Case Division and despite Maura Murray still not being classified as foul play, was added to the division's list of cold cases, based on media reports I've read.

Well, here we are 12 years later.

Brianna Maitland Update News - WCAX

To me it reads like an epitaph. Regarding Brianna Maitland they agree there was foul play, that the drug abuse theories were a stretch, and they may never solve her case, though they're still working on it.

BS as I know there are there who know what happened to Brianna that night! I can tell you I know because as a volunteer I arranged for her father to meet a person some thought was involved; I did this through personal channels I developed. 

The meeting didn't happen, but something else did. There was a young, dar-haired, well-toned guy in the front of the house when the father and I arrived. I got out of the truck. The guy asked me "what business do you have here?" I said "We would like to talk with..." 

"About what", he asked?

"Brianna Maitland", I answered.

He had a hissy fit, damning Brianna, telling us she got what she deserved, and said to tell her father exactly that...""

Well as her father was in the truck, he acknowledged he got the message!

***

In a lot of ways we as humans take the easy route to satisfy ourselves. For example I just ordered a pizza, to be delivered. Why, so I don't have to leave my house. I give the driver a $5 tip and pay $20 for the large pizza. Pretty good deal it would seem.

Anything goes wrong for humans and in the short run we don't forget; in the long we might tend to let it slide.

So what was going on that day for Brianna?

She was going shopping with her mother. She had to work two jobs. She got notice she'd passed her GED in the mail - YAY! She met someone shopping who warned her about going to work that night. As she went to work instead of staying home it tells me it was easier for her to face someone than call in. She left a note for her housemate whom she didn't know was gone for a few days saying she'd be home after work that night. She wasn't. 

What's this tell? 

On the surface she was aware of a problem. Three weeks earlier she got beaten up in a fight with a friend, and had recently filed charges - had a friend Shauna with her at the time. 

We know of rumors of a man who tried to kill himself leaving a note which told of his involvement. 

We know of a man who threatened three other women that he'd make them disappear like he had Brianna. 

All these people knew each other, though they all come from very different backgrounds in relationship to Brianna. None of the 3 is a suspect. But there are plenty of those.

In the post above, Major Hall of the VTSP claims they still don't know if Brianna disappeared at the hands of a stranger or someone she knew. I'd say there's nothing mysterious about circumstance. The circumstance being how there are so many of the people she's knows claiming here and there they know what happened. That is no coincidence. 

And you've got Mr. hothead blowing a gasket when I and Brianna's father stop by to visit with one of Bri's friends. 

Stranger abduction? Unlikely as too many known players in the field. 

As it turns out there are several theories, some pretty strong like the one where she was abducted and taken to a party, where for 3 days she smoked crack until she died. Why the hell abduct someone to have a party??? Think back-woods Vermont, not Hollywood!

Dutchburn Place after Dark (Simulation)

Think simple... 

The revenge theory is somehow gone by the wayside, the fight with the friend 3 weeks earlier. I'm not sure I agree.

That she owed money for drugs like crack and couldn't pay up, so was murdered? Doesn't add up with uncashed paychecks in her car - two of them. Why two?? But still, she had money and drug dealers who are owned money, would want it. There are those that would murder you for one dollar!

Elaborate traps to catch her have been theorized. I mean what a perfect place to car-jack someone! A deserted old house along the main drag outside of town. But why?? Remember, this isn't Hollywood. Only those who knew her would have had an idea of what time she would be done working - somewhere between 11:00 PM to midnight. Whoever was involved had to have had patience.

Again, what would they want? Worth being patient for? To abduct her to bring her to a party?? Get revenge - kill her? So why not there and then? 

Instead we find a car crashed mysteriously backwards into a house - backed up fast enough to break free a newly installed plywood panel. 

Yet we find signs of a party perhaps... a lime on the back of her car and empty drink containers. Did she plan to meet someone there? 

A warning during the day, worked two jobs, left note for housemate she'd be home... must have been pretty important meeting there at the Dutchburn place at 11:30 PM and ending up smashing the car, off it's rear wheel into the house.

Party gone bad?

Some party. Yeah!

Not. 

Followed from work and run off the road, forced to put the car in reverse with dire consequences, sign of a struggle outside the car... 

Two checks left uncashed tells me it wasn't for money. Invite to a party? Doubtful... in VT people aren't kidnapped to parties. 

So what??

Well of the several months I sent helping the family the encounter with the blow-fish keeps me coming back. Mr. Hothead that gave myself and Brianna's father a load of his opinion. And what do you know... I find out through sources Mr. Blowfish was there the night Brianna was abducted and it wasn't for a party.

Appears brianna set herself up as independent and set her own terms. That didn't make someone happy. There is plenty of history of murders occurring for less... several pertaining to jealousy. 

But regardless... sit Mr. Blowfish down and I'm fairly convinced he'll tell you what happened to her. I filed a complaint that day to VTSP through Brianna's father - how we were threatened with bodily harm. 

Two of the major suspects in my mind are gone from the area, for good it would appear, and yet the coverup continues. One of Brianna's ex-boyfriends confessed to knowing everything, and where she's buried. This was passed on to VTSP. 

The reward money to find Brianna runs out 2017... didn't know reward money did that, but it will. Before that happens talk to the lil' Blowfish - or his ex-wife. Have a sense that he can tell you all you need to know.

My condolences to her parents, brother, family and friends.  

BobKat's User Guide for Using Chantix to Quit Tobacco

PfizerLabs, the makers of the drug, Chantix, isn't paying me for this. This is from personal experience. A check from Pfizer for $100,000, in gratitude for this post to clarify their product would be nice :)  Just saying.

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or licensed to practice medicine.  The following is not intended in any way to assist a person using Chantix. It is posted primarily as personal experience and to share what i personally learned and experienced.

I started smoking tobacco cigarettes when I was 15. I'm 61 now. Of the possible 46 years smoking I was a non-smoker for 8 - 12 years. I've quit tobacco many times, sometimes for a month, up to 3 years.

I have quit "cold-turkey", and it can work, but I was younger then. I have used the gums, the patches, etc. Thing is I really don't want to smoke tobacco. Hate it!!

Getting off from it for most people is a terrible nightmare that can last for months. That's where the gum, patch and such are the solution. They provide nicotine to your body that curbs nicotine withdrawal symptoms associated with smoking.

However, you quit now!

That's correct. When using the gums, patches, etc. you don't want to smoke. You set a date and adhere to it.

Eventually after hundreds of $$'s you ween yourself off cigarettes. If it doesn't work you're out the $$ for the gums, patches, etc. and subscribing $7 a day to smoking when it could go to much more important goals.

Enter Chantix, made by Pfizer.

Of late I was starting to get to 2 packs a day. I have a new doctor and he was concerned about my smoking. Understandable. He recommended Chantix a year ago and I ignored it. Him.

20 days ago I took him up on the offer. I had nothing to lose, but my tobacco habit!

Chantix is apparently a very strong drug. The packaging is precise, made so you know which day you're taking what. Like for example you start out very slow with a min dose and escalate to the desired dose.

You can continue to smoke, if fact for the first few days it's encouraged... I went to day 8 before I quit.

Here's where the lack of education and plurred facts occur.

There are two "complaints" about Chantix that come to mind:

1) When to quit??
2) Does it affect the use of cannabis (in the free states, of course)?

RE: Question 2, cannabis users,  CB1 and CB2 receptors are not affected from what I've read. What limited experience I can share, no problem..

RE: When to quit??  Yeah this is a question I didn't have an answer to for days. I recalled my doctor said "you can smoke using it". But what he didn't say is when to quit.

So I was flummoxed.  When to quit?

Again, Chantix must be pretty powerful considering the care in which taking it is represented. I call it a non-opioid opiate...

You quit any time!! I'd suggest the 8th day or longer. Is it expensive? My insurance covers it 100% for 180 days. I pay nothing. I'm around Day 20.

Chantix is quite simple. Understanding what it does is essential to quitting tobacco and I'm surprised with so much confusion.

The reason tobacco users love it is nicotine, and receptors in our brain that let the nicotine attach, and dopamine is released into out body making us feel good, for a moment. We spent approximately 10 minutes smoking, and that's 10 minutes of a dopamine/good feeling. Then we go back to work and enter withdrawal. That can make us depressed, anxious, unfocused.

Chantix blocks the nicotine from attaching to the nicotine receptors. Further releasing a lower amount of dopamine than the nicotine. Still, it's dopamine - the feel good hormone.

So, once you feel the Chantix is in effect you can quit tobacco. You can cheat to as none of the nicotine gets to your brain. All you may satisfy by "cheating" is a temporary psychological satisfaction, at best.

My insurance covers this drug for 180 days. I'll not be a smoker after that and likely well before.

There is still the psychological withdrawal to go through - the need to smoke. But seriously, if you do it does very little. Except perhaps kill you with toxins, give you a head-ache, make you nauseous.

RE: Nightmares while using Chantix:

I trained myself over many years to have lucid dreams, so perhaps I am better prepared - yes, my dreams are more lucid after starting Chantix, and seriously it could be that I stopped smoking - cold turkey. The effects of Chantix on my dreams hasn't been significant. I am able to better remember them however.

The benefit of using Chantix for me was I could smoke and stop when I felt ready to do it. Totally up to me. And when I did stop, I experienced hardly any of the nasty physical withdrawal effects I remember from the past.

Good Fortune :)

Update, Mar. 18:

I'm somewhere around Week 4... I have bought one pack of cigarettes and smoked them in two days. They were to quell the psychological need, but did nothing to help. 3 days later I am home sick, couldn't sleep and several nasty problems, Fact is I have no interest now in tobacco and I just want this physical torment to end. The torment comes not from nicotine, but from the cigattes. My opinion, the tobacco industry adds addictive chemicals. As these chemicals likely do not touch upon nicotine receptors, what i did by smoking a pack was trigger other addictive receptors. So, today and for the past several days I've felt no withdrawal from nicotine, but I've felt like I had a cold - sinus problems, been nauseous, and even vomited two days ago, after awakening and drinking my coffee. I had taken my pills, including Chantix 15 minutes earlier. Sudden nausea and vomit on the floor.

So the good news is I'm off tobacco for good. The bad news is I feel terrible 4 weeks in. And this stuff - tobacco is legal and cannabis is not. Makes no sense!!

Update, Mar.27:

The psychological anxiety has become too much several times. Meaning I've bout 4 pacts and smoked them in some 45 days.

But I think I'm beginning to see, do see how it can work. It's a head-drug. It will change how a lot of things we imbibe in will work. They still work, but let me cut to the chase...

Chantix works by blocking the nicotine from attaching to my nicotine receptors. My doctor told me I could smoke. Why? Because while on Chantix it's not the nicotine you deal with when you stop. It's the psychological.

I now believe setting a date and time can work, but it's not necessarily the best approach. The cigarettes I smoke do nothing for me, except to sooth my habitual tendency.

My doctor was actually surprised when I called and asked him exactly how does one stop taking Chantix? Is it a step-down or does one just stop? I explained I was thinking I might be ready to stop taking it. I told him he had mentioned people taking it for a couple months. Stopping.

What he answered was sobering. You can smoke on Chantix because I have this habit. A habit that is not providing benefits. One that has been hurting me.

So now, yes, I'm still smoking, but learning to feel the smoke as undesirable. Like would I want an addiction to Spam? No offense to Hormel, love Spam... but do you see?

Without the nicotine what is a cigarette?

You might likely expect this process of smoking and finding it both rewarding and lacking difficult. There are other addictive chemicals in cigarettes. Short lived however. But for me these caused fatigue, hot flashes, confusion. As time goes on the symptoms are diminishing.

I'm fairly certain the effects on dreaming come from the Chantix. My doctor told me three studies found it was nicotine withdrawal. I've quite cold turkey and never had the kind of lucidity I'm experiencing now. I don't find dream enhancement to be a bad side-effect.

One co-worker shared that the the person she knew taking said it was messing with his mind. I can see that, but a slight twist of the dial you'll let go and realize you were likely fighting it. Yeah, it can play some tricks with your head, but so does packaged cigarettes.

I'm continuing the Chantix, will smoke when I feel like it, until I get bored of inhaling noxious smoke.

STOPPING AT THE CONVENIENCE STORE...

So the boss told us to go home about 2PM to work due to the winter storm. I live a half hour away in Maine. I needed cigarettes so I stopped at the local gas station that has everything at high prices.

I passed a smartly dressed, attractive brunette in her 30's I guessed as I was entering the store and she was leaving.

I went up to the counter to buy my cigs however there was a heated debate going on. The woman had bought tubes that people use to pack somehow with marijuana. A couple of customers had asked about them as the woman I passed had bought some.

"What are those for", the customer (lurker) asked?

The woman behind the counter was likely in her early to mid- 60's, my age, answered, "they use them to smoke marijuana".

The customer was aghast. What cave she crawled out of I do not know,

"Her partner, an man in his 60's also along with the other customer said "I wonder where they get it?" The cashier says, "they have a state facility right in town".

"OMG", the female customer said... "drugs are legal now"?

I politely interrupted and asked the cashier, "could I please have a pack of cancer sticks?"

"I'm sorry, what brand?"

Much bigger fish to fry is all i could think about on my way home.

HOW I GOT TO WHERE I AM NOW

Everyone considered individually - how did we come to be where we are now? You might well imagine, given statistics, at any given moment an infinite number of things are happening.

Sex for the first time

Eating

Falling asleep

Getting to work

Lighting a joint

About to get murdered, get an award, get arrested, win a $500 million lottery!

Right now, somehow, we got to where we're at.

We're feeling what?

I ponder how I got here now all the time. I shouldn't. But I have my reasons. Before I provide those reasons, a friend of mine just provided me with an epiphany. An old friend - we go back to the 70's. You may need to read it a few times.

"It's only how we got here. 

If we have free will the future is open to a myriad of possibilities and if we don't it's not worth worrying about."

It doesn't matter what job I work, how I'm doing,  how successful I am, how depressed. 

Right now my major stress is my job. I've been there 16 years, full time doing technical support for computer software. I got there because in the 90's I got to love computers.

Fast forwards and frankly it's a nightmare. What was a well defined though chaotic job has become a circus where us employees are the circus animals. Finding a new job is the only out, and playing along doing what one can to add sanity is all one can do. 

But it goes deeper, into the whole concept of Work/Life management. Age doesn't matter. However age does factor in.

When younger the tendency is to weigh one's life towards thyself. Work 20 hours a week overtime, but it's nothing compared to what one does when they not working. Get older, you're more likely to sleep when not working. I'm 61. 

My job has begun to expect working after hours, on weekends. Their argument is "salary". Salary means you can leave early, no punching out, just let supervisor know. In return, work extra, no change in money earned. Salary is fixed income. 

This post isn't about my job however. It is about how we got here.

I'm not blind to the potential of this post... statistically any number of things are happening to people at any given moment. Much is beyond our control right now. 

I simply wish to share some wisdom... that helped me understand Work/Life balance. 

"WORK/LIFE INTEGRATION"

One needs to start somewhere. 

If we have free will the future is open to a myriad of possibilities and if we don't it's not worth worrying about."