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INTRODUCTION:

Welcome to BobKat's Lair ®™

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A lair is a home; A castle; A burrow; A haven; a place where one should feel safe. To ensure our safety especially in one's lair, we have laws. And some laws cause more harm than good!

This is a good place. There's lots to see and do. It's apolitical while providing non-partisan news about politics, which we can't escape.

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My goal is here... to present topics which highlight the plight of people. Why, 2000 years after Caesar Augustus, are we still a people being hurt? With all our advancements in technology, medicine, communications, why are we a people still being hurt? Human nature hasn't changed much, but that doesn't mean it isn't time now for that to happen, and it is undoubtedly happening - hard to see however. This blog is part of that change and a witness to it.

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My blog is dedicated to my family, friends, mentors, and all others whom I am grateful to, and love(d).

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NOTE: Nothing included in my Blog is intended to advocate behavior illicit in nature, or in violation of man-made laws where harm to a living person, animal or the environment is involved. Person's under 17 probably shouldn't be here, though there is far worse out there. Just saying.


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October 08, 2014

MY LIFE AND TIMES... THE WORLD OF SEX - PART TWO

To me, human sexuality, mating, and the games people play are interesting. I was raised having to attend church, and sex certainly wasn't a subject being taught or preached, except in the Puritanical sense. I caught on rather fast; sex was taboo.

In high school where in the late 1960's we were taught about sex in health class, for one semester, the sex act was described in the showing of drawing of male and female genitalia. And from there it was all downhill, about pregnancy, STD's, and other harms. Although I suspect half my senior class had been fucking like rabbits since the 7th grade, I was a virgin, and I thought I was proud of it.

I should say this is not going to be an X-rated post, R, yes. Actually NR.

Yes I was still a virgin graduating HS, having had one girlfriend for a whole week, in 8th grade.

Well there was that one time, but we didn't have sex. My sister, a year and a half younger than myself, had a male friend named Mack, who was a big guy, toned, who lived with his uncle in a mobile home outside of town. Through my sister I found Mack to be a good friend.

One night I stopped by, a senior in HS, to have a few beers. There was a woman present, sitting on the couch. A little older than me, long dark hair and brown eyes. She wasn't overweight nor slender.

Mack, said, "she's yours, if you're interested".

I fought back my panic and my hormones kicked in. I looked at her and I asked, like I remember, hell, all I know is the next thing I'm naked next to her in a bedroom, and I think, no I know it was the most memorable one nighter I've ever had. We kissed and fondled each other, at one point Mack stuck his arm through the door and while handing me a condom, said, "thought you might need a first aid kit".

But I didn't use it... sex was taboo. All I remember other than kissing her was when I got home my lips were still sizzling. How ironic I could have been the poster child for Abstinence Education back then but nobody had thought of the idea or otherwise asked.

From there I went to flirting with the attractive older women at the department store I worked at. I flirted with some my age too, in fact, story of my life,  one of my childhood friends had already had sex with one of the cutest babes that worked at the store - yes, I believe him, and he said she loves sex, she's easy.

I asked her out and she said yes. We went out for dinner, which according to my friend had been unnecessary, but we did, and then we drove out of town to park off the road, on the dirt, at a college park. At first I felt we had to talk... until she said, "isn't there something you'd rather be doing than talking?"

After a long pause, the crickets telling me something, I finally leaned over and kissed her. Within seconds we were undressing each other. I had her shirt off. bra off and I was in the act of sucking her nipples when there was a loud knock on the car's window. "Police!"

Busted, but not really, we got dressed and had to drive away and I was so embarrassed and clueless I didn't think to go elsewhere. We never talked again.

I did however find a girlfriend, which will end this part of the post.

At the same job a co-worker gave me his sister's number. Said she'd love to find a guy and he already fixed it up, I just have to call.

I did. Her name was Denise. We met and it was love at first sight... long brown hair, slender, brown eyes... we did all manner of things, and always returned to her house, ended up on her couch where we kissed and I could feel her breasts outside her shirt. She kissed closed lip. I wanted to french kiss, nope, won't happen she implied. Apparently the guy just prior to me, let's say they french kissed and he dumped her, so she wouldn't let me french kiss her.

Now I'm somewhere between 17 and 20 years old then. A virgin. Not a sworn to abstinence. No such thing back then anyways. And we were in love and so far what frustrated me was french kissing and feeling her breasts under her shirt.

It never happened and she's unmarried as am I to this day.

Tear!

No, I lost my virginity in a state park. With 5 childhood friends we rented a large cabin and settled in for a few days. Now to understand the dynamics there were those of my friends who had no problem talking to the girls and going off with them. They could also drink, alcohol and a lot of it. One friend, William, was as naive as I was. That first night we left the party happening and wandered back to the cabin. Up came a dog, and a woman followed...

Then another woman. We all looked at each other, the dog came back, one of the women picked it up. William started talking first to the woman closet to him, I to the woman closet to me who wasn't holding the dog. I said, "we have a cabin up the road, would you like some Orial cookies?"

She said, "sure". The other woman lured William back down to the house as I walked up the road holding hands with the woman whom I don't even know if I ever asked her her name.

She was quite drunk, on Black Velvet, and often fell into me. The cabin was empty when we got to it - fortunate. She wore a tank top and jeans, and as we got into bed her breasts rolled from the tank top. We had the best sex ever, considering I didn't even know who she was.

When we finished I didn't walk her home... we kissed good-night and when she left I washed my penis in the community spigot. I had worn a condom, but I really believed what I was taught. Sex was taboo.

The lasting memory is the feel of her body, her breasts and the smell of Black Velvet.

"Wow, sure", I said, more quietly than I felt at the moment, and suddenly in two seconds I was surging with arousal. "Come in", I said.

"Why do men need sex?" she asked. I didn't know how to answer her. So I didn't. I offered her a beer. She said she had some beers at her apartment, would I like to come over. I said, "sure, thanks".

We had a beer, talked and gradually removed our clothes until we were in our underwear - it was Winter so we had had layers on. From there it was on to her bedroom where we got totally naked and had totally great sex - I had asked her prior to the sex, "are you using birth-control?"

She said, "yes".

They didn't have college degrees for abstinence back then or for sex education either... this was college in the 1970's and the only good course being taught was "Human Sexuality, by a psychology professor which I had taken and found very interesting and useful. Otherwise having sex was something I learned right out from the box, from experience.

We both climaxed together, me naked inside of her, and as we laid closely together, that's when she leaned out from the bed, fished around underneath her bed, then she found and pulled her diaphragm  out from under her bed, with it's anti-sperm gel. She said, "we need to insert this".

I don't know why... but this upset me. I didn't want to blame her, but I didn't want to blame myself either. Instead I did nothing. I dressed and walked back to my apartment and never saw her again. Just another potentially good relationship that didn't happen because I was bull-headed and confused. Seemed to happen a lot for many sorts of reasons.

The fact is I do really love women. It goes way back to my early childhood. I was the first-born, my sister came into the world a year and a half later. She was 3 and a half when I was five. By age four to five she had grown a lot. So when I was 7, and she five an a half... she had friends... actually we all did in that quaint, small town neighborhood that reminds me of "Leave It To Beaver". From early on all I seemed to do make acquaintances. I knew nothing about making friends, other than I began to hang out more with my sister and two other girls in the neighborhood.

No this story does not spiral out of control in an epilog about cross-dressing and playing doctor - though the latter we may have tried once, or twice.

Childhood really does last forever. Which is why adults need to ensure it is a very good childhood.

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